Words to my shadow

I don’t know ho to start that but i think this is the correct post to share what i think and from what condition m going through.

i m 24 years happy go lucky girl with a good job and friends and good life too.always the center of attraction of everyone .everyone thinks that her life is just so cool and how lucky she is..she gotta good face good height everything is good about her but when i daily end up my day and just stand last ti,e in front of my mirror i ask one question to myself.

so how was your day?

how many people get attracted to you?

how many actually know about you and know what you feel?

have you done with fake smile and strong girl mask ?

and then i just got blanked because daily same answers me to me just trying and harder move on.i have a disease called Vitilligo which IS JUST A SKIN DI-PIGMENTATION .But it effects on a person emotionally on a very much high level we just lost our natural skin color and get patches of white color and get lost the skin which we had before.its curable and m coping up with that.but still beneath my clothes i only know what i had.because of social causes i have to hide myself.because people only judge you by how you look no one cares about your upbringing your nature your inner beauty ..they just want to see what they want and what whole world want them to see.

i have to cover up myself like its on my legs and on my stomach so i can easily hide them but still i crave for the things normal things like i want to wear dresses want to wear normal heels want to just show how good looking i m with my tall legs want to go to the beach and wear a bikini and enjoy with waves..

so many times i went for shopping then i have t find a dress not according to my choice but according to that patches..like which dress can hide that whether i like that or not.. so many times have to drop my choice my dream dresses because of my body doesn’t allow that .i m happy with myself don‘t have any regret daily try harder to accept and live with joy but eventually somehow i feel like m not like others yes i m extra ordinary with the two shades of color in me.but not everyone will understand that.. they just love my outer beauty just my face and all .nobody know what i m in reality yet m not like others still m a human soul.. who just want to feel like one ..if i ever even try to explore or let myself out with the cloth cage then only my heart knows with how many questions i came back..like whats that how it happens to you? is it curable? are you ok with that? m a girl so main question oh god now how will you get married? really someone don’t bother this? and so on

so just to run away with all the questions i just again locked myself into a cloth cage and a temporary peace for me.. but when i see myself naked i feel proud like m the one who have everything just a patched don’t change who i m .this daily quote of strength enlighten me whole day.. and i just start my another day with a smile and a positive attitude.just a small blank place here in my heart i cant be what i m just because of society. who don’t even know about me. my parents my small group of friends really proud on me they accept me and my little extra ordinary skin as well.

i just feel sorry for the society who don’t accept the extra ordinary like us and because of them million of people like me just go through the same. we all like that a bird who have beautiful wings even know how to fly but still in prison of beautiful cage which that bird cant brake and cant fly as well. i just want to be myself . want to wear what i want.want to explore barefooted wherever i want.. and want people to know actually who i m.

its a not a story in that post million of emotions i write .. may be some people can understand that..may be someone cant but i feel very much happy because after a long time i share what i feel..

and it will helps me a lot. today i talk with myself write with my hands what i wanna say to me and the world..

thanks for your valuable time…

Ananya

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